


What You Doin’ to Me

by pasdexcuses



Category: Social Network (2010)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-30
Updated: 2012-01-30
Packaged: 2017-10-30 08:30:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/329808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pasdexcuses/pseuds/pasdexcuses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eduardo is friends with Randi first. He has no feelings for Mark. He actually has no thoughts regarding Mark other than those he usually has about the Zuckerbergs. That is, until Eduardo walks in on Mark changing clothes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What You Doin’ to Me

**Author's Note:**

> Written for anon's [prompt](http://tsn-kinkmeme.livejournal.com/8388.html?thread=14957252%22%20%5Cl%20%22t14957252) at the kink meme way back when... Finished, still unbeta'ed but whatever.

**Disclaimer:**  This work is based on the characters as portrayed in the movie The Social Network, not real people. And, obviously, I’m not making any money from this.

 

**_What You Doin’ to Me_ **

 

Eduardo has known Randi since he was seven and his parents first moved to the States. She has always been this intimidatingly bright girl in Eduardo’s class who can not only ace each and every test but can also manage to be the most popular girl. She defies the very existence of high school social stratification.

 

And when you’re like that, people tend to think you’re perfect. People who don’t talk to Randi on a daily basis can only see that side of her. They only see how she’s smart and funny and ridiculously gorgeous. But Eduardo has seen Randi in her sweats just before she’s about to get back her SATs, and  _this close_  to biting someone’s head off because  _what the fuck are they doing with her SATs results, a fucking DNA test_? Eduardo has also seen her being the very definition of arrogance, and he knows all about the way she obsesses about pretty much anything new. It isn’t healthy, mind you.

 

Don’t get him wrong, though. Eduardo loves Randi. In fact, if he’s being honest, Eduardo used to have a crush on her. Because, a, who  _didn’t_  have a crush on Randi Zuckerberg, and b, she was the first person ever to have talked to Eduardo when he first arrived, which, in Eduardo’s book, made her as close to perfection as you can get. But when he got over his initial fascination, Eduardo started developing an odd sort of crush on all the quirks that make Randi, well,  _Randi_.

 

So yeah, Eduardo totally had a very awkward, I’m-your-best-friend-and-you’re-mine sort of crush on her. Until Eduardo kissed her one day and he felt nothing. It wasn’t bad. It was just… not meant to be, Eduardo guesses. He felt no spark. Eduardo just felt incredibly out of place.

 

“Yeah, this isn’t happening between us,” Randi had said before she resumed eating her ice cream.

 

They had been fourteen, and ever since, each other’s best friends.

 

Sometimes, Eduardo feels sort of gay about it. And it isn’t just because Randi thinks dragging him along while she shops for dresses is okay but it’s also because there’s this whole confidence thing going on between them that, occasionally, will make Eduardo feel like a girl.

 

He told Randi about it once. Her answer had been to mock him endlessly, telling Eduardo how gay he  _obviously_  was.

 

But this doesn’t happen often.

 

All in all, Eduardo has never regretted being Randi’s friend.

 

That is, until Eduardo saw little Mark naked.

 

And even then, Eduardo wouldn’t call it regret.

 

*

 

Eduardo doesn’t remember the day he met Mark. He must have been what, seven, eight? Then Mark had to be around four or five. Really, Eduardo has always thought of Mark in terms of ‘Randi’s little brother’ and ‘Mark, who’s cute but never talks’.

 

When Eduardo was fifteen, he had been sure Mark had a crush on him. How else would anyone have explained all the rushed answers and blushes? And the way Mark never talked when Eduardo was around. It was really, really awkward. It didn’t help that Eduardo had  _just_  gotten over his own crush on Randi. But Eduardo never had the chance to figure it out as Mark eventually got over whatever it was.

 

He talks, now. A lot. Sometimes, he simply won’t shut up. He has an opinion on  _everything_ , which is endearing in a parental sort of way. Because that’s how Eduardo has always seen Mark. Like his own little brother.

 

Until that terrible, terrible day when Eduardo needs his econ book back, and Randi is out.

 

“I think Mark took it,” Randi says over the phone.

 

“Randi!”

 

“What? Just go and ask him. I know he looks like a monster who hasn’t showered in the last century but he won’t bite you.”

 

“I hate you,” Eduardo sighs, hanging up.

 

It’s not that he dislikes Mark. It’s just that he finds it incredibly abusive that Randi has no idea where she left his book.

 

Whatever. Eduardo still has to drive all the way to the Zuckerberg’s.

 

Mrs. Zuckerberg lets him in without a second thought but when he asks for Mark, she looks at him with surprise.

 

“I think he has my book,” Eduardo explains.

 

“Oh.” It may be Eduardo’s imagination but she looks disappointed. No, it’s definitely his imagination. “He’s in his room.”

 

Eduardo goes up the stairs, taking two at a time. Upon reaching Mark’s door, Eduardo throws it open without a second thought because, well, Mark has this thing where he doesn’t answer to knocks so Eduardo is used to simply ignoring the pleasantry altogether. Plus, Mark always locks when he doesn’t want any interruptions.

 

How the hell is Eduardo supposed to know Mark had chosen  _today_  to take his weekly shower?

 

Because why else would Mark be standing naked in the middle of his room. His back is, fortunately (or maybe not), to Eduardo.

 

And look, Eduardo isn’t a pervert or anything. But Mark’s ass is  _in his face_  so he can’t simply ignore it. Or how round and pasty white and cute and  _touchable_  it looks.

 

Eduardo doesn’t know what kind of face he’s making right now but it must be quite something if it makes Mark blush bright red as soon as he turns around and sees Eduardo standing there. That turns out to be another problem all by itself because Mark is naked, okay? And he’s, like,  _huge_.

 

And now Eduardo can feel his own face growing impossibly hot.

 

On impulse, Eduardo closes the door.

 

He runs down the stairs, forgets to say goodbye and drives for an hour until he thinks he has stopped being embarrassed.

 

Things only get worse after that.

 

*

 

So, Eduardo needs to talk to someone about this. Because, seriously.

 

He can’t get  _that_  image of Mark out of his head. Mark is… Well, really, it’s just that… You know, size has never been an issue in Eduardo’s life. But there’s big and then there’s Mark. It’s like all the body weight he couldn’t amass in his arms and legs went right to his dick. You can’t just ignore that. It’s not an ignorable thing.

 

He texts Randi, mostly because he has to talk to _someone_ about this and Eduardo has enough delicacy to know he shouldn't be divulging intel on Mark's dick size to the outside world. He tries his best to make it look as joke. A joke he can’t say to Randi's face because Eduardo would probably blush, and that’s so inappropriate on so many different levels, Eduardo isn’t sure Randi would let him anywhere near Mark again.

 

_dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock..._

 

_Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings._

 

_that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it._

 

And when Eduardo writes frightening, he means it. It’s scary. Like those nightmares you can’t quite get rid off? Like, he can be showering and looking down at his own body, and there it will be, his own dick. Normal, not too small, not too big. Then he’ll remember Mark’s, and, okay.

 

It’s frightening when Eduardo gets sort of embarrassed when he looks down at himself. Because he’ll be thinking about Mark, which isn’t right. 

 

*

 

Eduardo avoids Randi’s house like the plague for the next week. His resolution lasts until he reluctantly agrees to go buy shoes with her (he needs new ones for this suit he just bought, okay?).

 

“You know,” Randi starts as she tries on a pair of impossibly high red stilettos. “With the way you’re going on about this, I’d say it was  _you_  who had a crush on my brother.” 

 

Eduardo gapes at her.

 

“Don’t give me those Bambi eyes, Wardo. We all know Mark had a crush the size of his dick on you,” she says, looking up from the stilettos to smirk at him. “And you already know how big that is.”

 

“Oh, God! Does Mark know you verbally abuse him like this?”

 

At this, Randi shrugs in a way that reminds Eduardo of Mark, and Jesus, why did he have to walk in on Mark?

 

“Listen, Wardo, seeing naked people happens, okay? It’s an unfortunate side-effect of being human,” Randi states. “Now, come back home with me before my family starts thinking Mark’s naked body scarred you for life.”

 

The thing is, Eduardo thinks he  _has_  been scarred for life.

 

“What do you think?” Randi asks him, turning around in the heels. She’s actually taller than Eduardo on those.

 

“Are you sure those things won’t crack your bones?”

 

“What? Of course not, don’t be ridiculous. I’m buying them.”

 

*

 

They get to Randi’s home where Mrs. Zuckerberg asks if everything went alright.

 

“Yeah, Eduardo helped me out with my shoes,” Randi answers.

 

Eduardo thinks he hears Mark snickering from somewhere in the living room.

 

“Well, Eduardo, you’re staying for dinner?”

 

It isn’t really a question. Eduardo has learnt this over the years of being friends with Randi. Mrs. Zuckerberg is not one to take no for an answer.

 

At the table, they’re all chatting conversationally, going on about colleges and what they’re planning on doing next. It’s quite pleasant actually.  That is, right up to the point where the conversation takes a turn to gowns and galas and whatever else and Mr. Zuckerberg asks, “What did you need new shoes for anyway?” 

 

“There’s a party in a week,” Randi says simply. But then she catches Mark’s eyes. She seems to consider her next words as she looks from Mark to Eduardo. “You know, I also really just wanted those gorgeous, red  _fuck-me_  shoes.”

 

“Randi Zuckerberg!” her mother exclaims, her eyes nearly popping out.

 

Mr. Zuckerberg attempts not to choke on his food (he’s succeeding rather poorly) while Mark knocks down a glass of juice and Eduardo feels his face getting so, so hot.

 

God, he  _hates_  Randi.

 

*

 

Lately, Eduardo has been wondering when exactly his life became a downright mess. And then he remembers walking in on Mark. That’s when. Or maybe it was during the dinner because right there, in front of Randi and her parents and, god, in front of  _Mark_ , Eduardo’s mind went, for a split second,  _Yeah,_ fuck me,  _Mark_. Which is why Eduardo hates Randi and her stupid mouth.

 

Because before Eduardo might have been able to convince himself it was a case of Mark having a ridiculously gigantic dick that intimidated him. Now, however, it is quite clear that Eduardo’s obsession is more along the lines of “I am so hot for that, I’d jump you if you weren’t my best friend’s little brother”, which is simply unacceptable. Eduardo was brought up to be a respectable man and not a lecherous guy who wants to have sex with the pretty young thing, who (this bears repeating in Eduardo’s head) is his best friend’s little brother.

 

Honestly, what is wrong with him? This is  _Mark_  here. Not that Mark is unattractive because in his geeky, young sort of way, Eduardo supposes he is. Like, Mark has these incredible eyes that shine with excitement when he goes on and on about his coding. And the small curls. Okay, those are  _adorable_. Seriously, even before (oh, please, shut up, that was  _not_  a sign for  _anything_ ) The Incident (it helps Eduardo’s mind, not mentioning the specifics because that would involve mentioning Mark’s cock, and well, that’s exactly something he’s desperately trying to avoid) Eduardo wanted to maybe thread his fingers in Mark’s hair. When he showered, mostly. Because Mark’s hair looks shiny and soft after he showers (not that Eduardo’s taking notes). And Eduardo has always been a curious guy.

 

Or maybe Eduardo shouldn’t be the one making this assessment because, hello bias.

 

Okay, so Eduardo has a massive (don’t think about it, don’t think about) crush on Mark.

 

He can deal with this. Eduardo can totally deal with this.

 

*

 

Eduardo  _can’t_  deal with this. Though, mostly, this is Mark’s friend’s fault.

 

Eduardo wants to throttle Dustin, who he barely knows. His hands are just itching to get a hold of the boy and tell him to piss off, which may or may not be a little too irrational.

 

Eduardo has seen Dustin once or twice in his entire life. He knows he’s Mark’s best friend but right now, knowing that they  _both_  stay up coding and wired in until odd hours, knowing that Dustin comes and  _stays the night over_ , now, when Eduardo knows the two of them are locked in Mark’s room, doing who knows what, well,  _now_  Eduardo wants to throttle Dustin. Because. Well, Eduardo doesn’t need a reason to feel protective, does he?

 

“Earth to Wardo,” Randi almost yells, waving her hand right in front of his eyes.

 

“What?” he snaps.

 

“You, my dear friend, are being a weirdo.”

 

This makes Eduardo look back at Randi. She’s eyeing him like she knows Eduardo has been considering becoming an assassin (or hiring a hitman) for the past half hour. Eduardo thinks he should say something. Defend himself. But he doesn’t because Mark chooses right now to sprint downstairs.

 

“You’re here,” Mark points out. “I mean, hi, Wardo.”

 

Is it him or is Mark blushing? It’s Eduardo. It’s gotta be Eduardo.

 

“Hi, Mark.”

 

“Mark, aren’t you busy? ‘Cause we are,” Randi quips.

 

That has Mark rolling his eyes exaggeratedly, and going back upstairs, much to Eduardo’s distress. 

 

*

 

The following week, it’s a friend of Mark’s named Bill. Bill something Eduardo can’t be bothered to remember because Bill Something looks at Mark with his big brown eyes. Eduardo has to fight for self control. Has to remind himself that staring at someone isn’t a federal crime (though, with the way Bill ogles Mark, it really should be).

 

Randi keeps looking at him like she knows.

 

Mark keeps saying ‘Hi, Wardo’ like he  _doesn’t_  know.

 

And Eduardo, Eduardo keeps wishing he could deal with it.

 

But he can’t

 

*

 

Next, it’s Chris who Eduardo wants to punch in the face. It’s, on a level, worse than Dustin (though not as bad as Bill) because Chris is so obviously gay. Fine, not obviously. In fact, Eduardo only knows about it because the matter comes up when Eduardo's within earshot, which inevitably leads to him thinking about the things Chris is probably thinking about Mark. Things that are not okay.

 

But then Dustin rings the doorbell. They’re all in the living room, for some reason, so when Eduardo casually strolls by, he gets to see the way Chris looks at Dustin.

 

Eduardo thinks, out of all Mark’s friends, he might like Chris the best.

 

*

 

It goes on for two weeks in which Eduardo is Not Having Thoughts About Things That Are Not Okay. He tries. Eduardo tries so much he even talks to Dustin (he hates Bill, okay? He absolutely  _loathes_  Bill) and finds out Dustin is actually funny. And smart. Not genius-like as Mark but really fucking smart. Two weeks in which he finds himself spending more and more time at Randi’s.

 

Eduardo tries really hard. He wants to be a respectable young man. He does, honestly.

 

But, sometimes it’s just too hard. Because Mark doesn’t make it any easier for Eduardo.

 

Like, Mark totally lets his shirt ride up, exposing his skin.

 

And it’s not as if Eduardo’s brain short-circuits at the sight (thank  _God_  he’s past that stage). It’s more that he keeps picturing his own hands doing all the skin-exposure. Which is totally treading on Thoughts About Things That Are Not Okay territory.

 

It’s as if Mark is doing it on purpose (if Eduardo didn’t know any better, he’d be  _sure_  Mark is doing it on purpose). He does these things. Biting his lip or going on rants about how much he hates this or how inane that is. And just generally looking sort of hot around Eduardo.

 

Look, it’s not that Mark doesn’t look hot always (though Eduardo admits to being a little bit biased here, so maybe you shouldn’t listen to his thoughts on Mark). It’s just that there was a time in the not so far away past when Mark would walk downstairs in his pajamas, looking like he hadn’t shower in a week and smelling like it.

 

Now, however, every single time Eduardo is around, Mark is always ( _always_ , as in irritatingly permanently) looking clean and smelling nice (God, Mark smells so nice. Eduardo wonders if he smells nice all over… Jesus Christ, Eduardo, do  _not_  go there, that is a very dark corner). What is Eduardo supposed to make of this, huh?

 

*

 

Then one day, a very strange thing happens. Eduardo is waiting for Randi to get ready so they can head out to a party and Mark says, “Hey, Wardo? I want to show you something.”

 

He brings his laptop to Eduardo, sitting very, very close to him. Like, their knees are bumping. It’s so close, really, that Eduardo can smell the aftershave on Mark. Which Eduardo had no idea Mark even knew existed. But that is not the point of the very strange occurrence. The point here is that Mark sits very close to Eduardo as he clicks around, and right there, in front of him, there’s something that looks a little like a website.

 

“What is this?”

 

“I’m calling it TheFacebook. For now. It’s a website I’m programing but right now I only have the basic structure,” Mark explains. “I want to bring people’s social life online.”

 

“Like MySpace?”

 

Rolling his eyes, Mark answers, “No, not like MySpace. Way cooler. And more exclusive. But it needs money, which I obviously don’t have. So, I was wondering if you wanted in.”

 

Eduardo blinks because what the hell?

 

“It’s okay if you don’t want to. I mean, there’s this kid, Sean, who knows tons of people and—“

 

“I want to,” Eduardo says before Mark gets a chance to ramble on about Sean or whoever the fuck else. “I mean, I have money I made in—“

 

“Oil features,” Mark cuts him off, then blinks at his screen, like he realizes maybe that was the wrong thing to say.

 

And then Mark blushes. He has the cutest blush ever but that is not the point of the very strange occurrence. The point here is that Mark asked him to be a part of something. Eduardo has no idea what that is and he still said yes.

 

*

  
“So, I heard you and my brother are engaging in business,” Randi says when they’re having lunch.

 

Not at her place, for once.

 

“Yeah, I, um, I really think it’s, uh, good business.”

 

“Wardo, stop being so pathetic.”

 

“What? What did I say?”

 

“If you want to get into Mark’s pants, just ask him out. It’s not like his pasty-white ass is all that out of your league.”

 

“What? What even is this! Where did that come from?”

 

“Eduardo, the fact that your observational skills are dreadful does not mean that everyone else in the world is quite as blind.”

 

“Well, you’ve got it wrong. I… don’t like Mark.”

 

Randi takes a moment to stare him down. She doesn’t blink for more than is humanly possible before rolling her eyes and saying, “Okay.”

 

*

 

“So what if I told you Mark is totally into you?” Randi asks one morning.

 

“Come on, aren’t we past this?”

 

“No.”

 

“Mark doesn’t like me.”

 

Mark doesn’t like Eduardo, okay? That would be inappropriate.

 

“Oh, but he does. For all his geekiness, I’m a afraid Mark has been awakened to the wonders of the adult world thanks to one Mr. Eduardo Saverin, whose ass he can’t wait to tap.”

 

“That… was an obnoxiously long sentence, Randi.”

 

“What, no objections?”

 

“I’m just having trouble processing all the levels of wrongness you just trespassed.”

 

“I’ll prove it to you.”

 

“Prove what?”

 

“That you’re the star in Mark-y Mark’s wet dreams.”

 

“Jesus Christ, Randi.”

 

Eduardo doesn’t put up a fight because Randi wouldn’t really do that to her brother. And because he doesn’t have the energy. Not because Eduardo is curios or anything like that.

 

*

 

Okay, so Eduardo knows Randi well enough to know she meant it. And maybe Eduardo wanted her to do it. Except, in retrospect, he should’ve known better because proving Mark has a thing for Eduardo obviously has to involve Eduardo. And Randi’s human experiments are rather… unorthodox and… life-scarring would be a fitting way to describe them. 

 

*

 

Eduardo is staring at Mark who is staring at Eduardo who is staring at Mark, and really, it’s a pretty ridiculous cycle that fucking  _Randi_  got him into.

 

This was  _not_  the plan when he’d said yes to helping her out with her charity bake sale. It wasn’t part of the plan having to throw away one of his nice t-shirts because Randi decided she wanted to be a two-year old again and throw half of the cookie mix on Eduardo.

 

“Randi, what the fuck!” Eduardo had very eloquently exclaimed some twenty minutes ago when the situation wasn’t as grave as it currently is.

 

“Dude, you should see your face!” Randi had prompted.

 

She did, however, place a nice towel on his hands, offered the bathroom and given him an innocently-looking t-shirt.

 

“Where did you get this?” Eduardo had asked out of simply curiosity because Randi isn’t the kind of girl who’d buy guys’ clothes for herself.

 

He should’ve known better. Conniving woman.

 

“Oh, a boyfriend must’ve left it here at some point,” she had answered airily.

 

Really, Eduardo should’ve known better.

 

Because after his shower, Eduardo had worn said t-shirt (look, he wasn’t about to go around naked in  _Randi’s_  home) and walked downstairs.

 

There, he had found Randi and Mark hunched over the oven, fighting about the appropriate time to get the miserable amount of cookies she and Eduardo had managed to make with whatever had been saved from Randi’s childish regression.

 

Or at least that had been what they seemed to have been doing until Eduardo had walked in.

 

Because the moment Mark saw him, his jaw dropped as he blinked slowly.

 

“You’re wearing my shirt,” Mark said, about two minutes ago.

 

And now they’re here. Engaging in a moment of pure awkwardness.

 

Why, Eduardo has to ask, is life doing this to him?

 

Like, does he really need any more prompting for all these Thoughts About Things That Are Not Okay that he is, very clearly,  _not_  having? 

 

“I’m wearing your shirt,” Eduardo parrots after the longest fifteen seconds of his life. Then, he turns to Randi. “I’m wearing  _Mark_ ’s shirt!” he exclaims but not really in amused excitement and more in that ‘you fucking bitch, I am going to kill you in your sleep’ creepy kind of way.

 

“Oops,” Randi offers, shrugging her shoulders.

 

Eduardo wants to shake her. What the hell is wrong with her?

 

However, Eduardo is momentarily distracted by the way Mark’s cheeks turn a light shade of pink. By the way Mark is tugging his shirt down and muttering something under his breath that Eduardo doesn’t get.

 

He’s gone within the next five seconds, and Eduardo is left alone with Randi and her creepy smirk.

 

“You do realize my brother had to flee the scene because you in his shirt gave him a massive hard-on?”

 

Oh. God.

 

“Randi, what the fuck!” Eduardo yells.

 

“What? It’s true.”

 

“No, it isn’t. Stop verbally-abusing him. He’ll never… He’ll never date if you keep intimidating him!”

 

“Because  _you_  are so particularly inclined to my brother dating someone,” Randi throws back, this time very seriously. “Unless that someone’s name starts with Eduardo and ends with Saverin. And yes, I meant  _you_.”

 

Eduardo is sure he’s doing the gaping goldfish thing. He’s absolutely sure.

 

“Get your shit together, Eduardo. We’re taking those cookies to their rightful home. And, for heaven’s sake, take the hint.”

 

*

 

He gets over it. Over wearing Mark’s shirt and Mark running upstairs. He even wills himself to mentally block Randi’s comment.

 

(If he keeps the shirt as a souvenir, well, it’s nobody’s business but his own.)

 

He gets used to stopping by the Zuckerberg home. Not just to see Randi but to see Mark and catch up on Mark’s project. It looks really good. Eduardo can feel it. It’s going to be huge.

 

It still surprises him that Mark wants him to be a part of it. But Eduardo doesn’t dwell too much on it.

 

After all, he’s just too fucking ecstatic to be putting his money to good use.

 

*

 

It’s all going relatively fine (well, as fine as it can go with Eduardo still not quite managing  _not_  to have Thoughts About Things That Are Not Okay) so of course that’s when Eduardo finds himself in Mark’s room. In all honesty, it’s not even Eduardo’s fault. It starts because Mark borrows one of Eduardo’s econ books.

 

“You can pick it up whenever you need it,” Mark says when Eduardo hands him the book.

 

Eduardo takes Mark up on his offer one afternoon on his way home.

 

It’s going fine. Mrs Zuckerberg lets him in but Mark isn’t in his room. Eduardo finds the book after a swift scan of Mark’s room.

 

He’s writing Mark a note on a post-it when in walks Mark in a towel.

 

Which, what even?

 

Like, how horribly does the universe intend to fuck with him?

 

Seriously.

 

Eduardo’s embarrassment is far from over, however. Because the universe clearly hates him, and the next thing he knows,  Mark’s towel is dropping to the floor.

 

He must look like a monster was just in his face because the next thing Mark says is, “Am I really that bad looking?”

 

“What? No, no. Mark you’re, uh, pretty. That is, you’re handsome. I mean, you have nice, uh, body parts,” Eduardo says in a rushed breath. Involuntarily, his eyes drop to Mark  _massive_  dick. That’s when he realizes he probably has put his foot in his mouth. “I mean, you have a nice body. Oh, fuck. Uh, I-“

 

 _No, you are most definitely not ugly_.

 

Mark is staring at him, considering what Eduardo just said.

 

This is totally unfair because really.

 

Yet Mark doesn’t seem to understand that this is a very awkward social situation.

 

Instead, cocking his head to the side, Mark says, “Well, this is unfair.”

 

It is.

 

To Eduardo.

 

Who has been trying oh, so hard to not have Thoughts About Things That Are Not Okay.

 

But not to Mark.

 

“What?” Eduardo manages

 

“Unfair. I think this whole situation is unfair.”

 

“ _Unfair_?” Eduardo parrots.

 

“Yes, that is my assessment. Because you’ve seen me naked twice. And I haven’t seen you, not even once,” Mark deadpans like he hasn’t just implied he wants to see Eduardo naked.

 

“Oh, my god,” Eduardo starts, turning around so he’s facing Mark’s desk instead of Mark’s  _very naked_  body. “Mark, I am so sorry. I just came for my book and was leaving a post-it to let you know the book hadn’t disappeared or whatever. Like, it’s not that I…”

 

Eduardo’s rambling is interrupted when Mark, still naked, goes to sit in front of his computer. Which is on his desk, which happens to be right in front of Eduardo.

 

“Dude, you’re gonna freeze,” Eduardo points when Mark shows no signs of, well, anything, really.

 

“Is that something that worries you?”

 

“Yes,” Eduardo answers automatically.

 

It surprises both of them. So much so that Mark turns in his chair (still naked, very, very naked).

 

“Why?”

 

“Because.”

 

Raising an eyebrow, Mark waits for him to speak.

 

Eduardo doesn’t really want to elaborate on that.

 

Then Mark stands up, taking two steps forward to Eduardo.

 

“Is it because you like me?” he asks.

 

Mark doesn’t wait for Eduardo’s answer.

 

Instead, he presses his lips to Eduardo’s. Then, moving his body closer to Eduardo, Mark kisses him with more intent.

 

The thing is, Mark is naked and pressing into him.

 

Mark.

 

Naked.

 

Pressing.

 

What.

 

The.

 

Fuck.

 

And he doesn’t stop.

 

He doesn’t stop and it’s just not polite not responding so naturally Eduardo starts kissing him back.

 

A lot.

 

They kiss and Eduardo’s heart drums against his chest as though he just ran a marathon.

 

It beats loud, fast.

 

And Eduardo thinks,  _This is so wrong_.

 

Because it is.

 

Very wrong.

 

“Mark,” Eduardo says into Mark’s mouth.

 

“Hmm?” is all that Mark answers.

 

Placing his hands on Mark’s arms, Eduardo stops him.

 

This is wrong.

 

“Um, you really need pants?” Eduardo says because Mark is staring at him expectantly.

 

It takes one second for Mark’s face to go from dazed to blank.

 

Well, shit.

 

Turning around, Mark bends down ( _do not stare, do not stare_ ), picks up a pair of boxers and puts them on. He then goes to sit in front of his computer without even sparing a glance in Eduardo’s direction.

 

It takes Eduardo five seconds of this to think that maybe he fucked up.

 

It takes him seventeen to decide that there’s no maybe in there. He definitely fucked up.

 

“Mark?” Eduardo tries.

 

Mark shrugs.

 

“You came for your book, got it,” he answers but his voice is dismissive.

 

It’s a tone Eduardo has never heard directed at him. He knows what it means, though.

 

Eduardo doesn’t need any more encouragement to leave Mark’s room.

 

*

 

Okay, so he fucked up even though he was trying to do the right thing.

 

Eduardo hates his life.

 

Really.

 

*

 

“You gonna tell me what the fuck you did to him?” Randi nearly yells over the phone two days after the incident.

 

“What?”

 

“Mark. He’s been in such a bad mood not even Dustin will go near him! What the hell did you do to him?”

 

“I…”

 

“I’m driving to yours to sort this shit out.”

 

With that, she hangs up.

 

Eduardo knows Randi well enough to accept two things. The first, Randi is coming and she won’t leave until she’s satisfied. The second, he better start making some coffee.

 

*

 

“Look, Eduardo, I get that sometimes it takes you a while to get your head out of your ass. It’s a pretty ass, I can see why you’d get distracted but this is my little brother. And you’re fucking with his head, and I will not have that,” Randi says after Eduardo babbles his version of the story.

 

“Randi!”

 

“Eduardo, you have a pretty ass. Embrace it.”

 

“You’re a horrible person.”

 

“Because I’m trying to get my brother laid or because I’m trying to get  _you_ laid? Honestly, Eduardo, this has become ridiculous. My brother nearly bit our mailman’s head off for coming ten minutes late this morning. And then he’s been sulking all over the place. Even when he goes out, he’s brooding. I think our neighbor’s dog is actually afraid of him, and you’ve seen that dog. That shit’s a monster.”

 

Randi, like Mark, talks at about three thousand words per minute.

 

“Look, I was just trying to do the right thing.”

 

“What?”

 

“He’s younger than me!”

 

“By, like, three and a half years.”

 

“And he’s  _your_  younger brother. Hell, he’s practically  _my_  younger brother.”

 

“A, if you haven’t taken the hint, I’m okay with you banging my little brother. And b, he’s not your younger brother.”

 

“But still.”

 

“But still nothing. Stop being a dickhead. And fix this.” Randi stares at Eduardo with intent. It wouldn’t take a genius to figure out she means it. But it takes someone like Eduardo to know just how much. “I mean it, Eduardo,” she says even though she knows she doesn’t need to.

 

*

 

Eduardo thinks about it. For the first time since this whole mess started, he allows himself to have Thoughts About Things That Are Not Okay.

 

And he thinks. For all those times he stopped himself halfway to a thought about Mark that wasn’t related to schoolwork or code, Eduardo allows himself to think.

 

*

 

It’s been roughly a week since Eduardo last saw Mark. He clenches and unclenches his fists, fingers hovering over his phone.

 

He sends the text around midday, not really expecting an answer.

 

_I think it’s unfair, too._

 

*

 

Mark’s phone buzzes on his desk while he’s sleeping. It’s a miracle Mark actually wakes up instead of sleeping through it.

 

He actually laughs out loud when he reads Eduardo’s text.

 

When he hits ‘call’, Mark feels giddy. But good.


End file.
